Wake Me Up When It’s Over

Fear, uncertainty and discomfort being my compasses toward growth sound profound and spiritual, and yet what I experienced this past week didn’t feel profound and spiritual. Yet it gave me the opportunity to observe myself being in complete fear of the unknown.

I mentioned, “observed myself” because that is exactly what happened. The me that is wise, rational, courageous, and most of all trusting, observed the me that was doubtful, fearful, and irrational—wanting to stay in bed with the covers over my head and say, “wake me up when it’s over.”

After much footwork, I was called by an organization that was interested in me becoming one of their Spanish Medical Interpreters. I spoke with them on the phone and we agreed on a date for my two and a half hour interview, which included a written and oral test. I was excited and grateful that the footwork had paid off.

I had a week to prepare for the interview. I prepared by reading the material they provided, and also from courses I had taken previously. I felt comfortable with the information since it was more of a refresher. The oral test on the other hand, the role-play to prove my skills and ability to interpret, was a bit more intimidating.

I spent just as much time stressing about and projecting over the interview as I did preparing for it. There were times that I thought about cancelling or not showing up because I just didn’t know if I had what it took to be a Spanish medical interpreter. I had such anxiety about it. As I observed myself going through these agonizing days until my interview, I prayed and allowed myself to be with these feelings.

The day of the interview came and went and I did great. I passed both tests and the women who interviewed me were impressed and offered me the position. I could then exhale, reflect, and recognize once again that things were not as insurmountable as I projected them to be.

Most of the time before the interview and my first assignment I spent being in fear of the unknown. Walking through it was incredibly tough. I wanted to skip over all the emotions and feelings I was experiencing and be on the other side of things. I could have easily let my fear of the unknown keep me where I was and not walk through the door that was opening for me—a door I’ve wanted to walk through for quite sometime.

Having had this experience is a reminder that situations are not as I project them to be. As long as I do my part, whatever that may look like, I will prevail. I will be stronger and wiser because of it, no matter how it turns out. It’s not the outcome or the destination that matters, but the journey and the opportunities for continued self-awareness, healing, and spiritual evolution.