How do we know when it’s time? Time to make a move. Time to launch a new project. Time to change jobs. Time to start a new business, birth a vision, initiate a relationship, have a child, go to college or take a sabbatical.
Many times in my life I’ve been faced with an almost overwhelming feeling of stagnation, and that somehow, some way, things needed to change—and change radically.
I felt that way when I was 20. I had a good paying job, but the job was very stressful and didn’t offer much of a future. So I decided to relocate and go to college, and that proved to be a good decision. It was sad leaving behind friendships and the city and area I had grown up in, but more strongly than the tug of familiarity was the need to disentangle myself with all I had known, and what resulted was a significant phase of personal growth and healing.
Just three years later I was married, still in college and playing guitar in a rock band, and six years after that, a feeling for the need to change came again. Another relocation to Los Angeles resulted and a shift in career direction. Twelve years later I was making good money again and doing interesting work, but again stressed out and feeling completely stagnant. It took two more years after the feeling came before I was able to affect the next and most radical change of my life; leaving behind a marriage of nineteen years, a job of eleven years, and moving from Los Angeles to Asheville North Carolina.
What came within a year and four months was that I met my present wife and partner Maria, and after just four months I asked her to marry me. Together with a loving and harmonious marriage I also inherited three teenagers in the package. Then another two years after that I left my corporate job and started Balanced Is.
Now eight years after leaving my life in California behind, almost seven years since asking Maria to marry me, and five years from the launch of Balanced Is, Maria and I both have been processing a very strong need for radical change in our lives. Within a two and half week span of time, the last two of our now young adult children left home and moved across the country. Our beloved feline of many years has just about reached the end of her life, our landlord wants to sell our home, and doors are closing in some areas of our lives while opening in others.
How do we know when it’s time? In my case it comes from paying attention to the signs and being present with how I’m feeling about them. If I see the signs and I feel stagnation and uneasiness with my life, coupled with the fear of change, most likely it’s time for change. If I’m feeling like I want change, and the feeling is more like a desire to run, than most likely the place I need to be is right where I am, facing the fear of what it is I want to run from.
In either case there is fear. Fear of change, or, fear of staying where we are and facing the music. If we can discern the difference then we’ll know when it’s time.
In my present life stage, the fear I feel is the normal and anticipated fear of radical change. What I know in my bones is that now is the time. What I’m afraid of is change. What I’m doing is being with the fear and initiating the change.
What change you might ask? Stay tuned for more on that in a subsequent blog. In the meantime, can you discern the gentle pull toward familiarity, from the nagging feeling that change is needed? And, can you discern the fear of change from the fear of staying right where you are? I’d love to hear your change stories in the comments.
Great Blog – the 1/2 dose or so biz changes were all pretty easy with little anxiety or fear. Probably because I was a bit naive. The personal changes [divorce] on the other hand were filled with fear, uncertainty and turmoil. They also took too ling to settle on a decision.All of the changes produced a a great sense of liberation
On the personal side they led me to the most fulfilling current 20plus year relationship. I shudder to think what life would have been without these changes. They were all for the good
Wonderful story Art. Thank you for sharing. It reminds me of how difficult it was to leave my first marriage, even though everything in my bones said that’s what needed to happen. It was difficult, but when I was finally able to leave I felt liberated, and just as with you, it opened me up to being able to meet my present wife Maria, and have the most amazing marriage that I have with her.
This really spoke to me this morning Glenn. I have spent the summer doing exactly what you described, embracing my fear of change. Right now I am making a professional leap that is very different from what I have been doing the last 13 years. Many times I have been tempted to start my new venture, but keep the old one running. I know however, that keeping the old in place just to feel safe is actually going to cause more confusion and stress in the long run. Thanks so much for sharing this! This week I am gong to make some extra time to sit and listen to my higher self and really be with how I feel. I really needed the reminder that the fear is guiding me in so many ways, I don’t need to avoid it.
Thank you for sharing your story Sarah. Knowing the work you do and all your amazing talents I look forward to seeing what new vision you will be birthing. I hope our paths will continue to intersect.
For me, change always comes with a feeling. It’s almost like change itself is a feeling, hard to describe other than the nature of it.
Change brings with it a sense of not knowing, not being able to predict or plan. It’s okay to feel this fear of the unknown, this grounding sense of “I’m not really in control like I thought I was.” This fear taught me that I’m a part of something much bigger than myself and that my intentions and actions are important but holding on to MY plan is not.
As a student of the Universe, I’ve been learning about another gift of change and the fear of it. That is, the FREEDOM of the unknown. I am not bound to a single outcome, idea, plan, or vision. The fear of the unknown is equally matched (yin and yang style) to the freedom of it. Do I fear the freedom of the unknown, of change? Yes, sometimes, but fearing freedom can feel less crippling than simply feeling fear itself.
I want to catalyze change by feeling the fear and the freedom of the unknown.
Thank you for your words of wisdom Jordan. They resonate strongly with me.
glenn