Has there ever been a time in your life when you experienced something you perceived as bad? Have you considered that perhaps what you perceived as bad could actually be a good thing?
What if we were to look at things from the perspective of people doing things for us instead of to us, and things happening for us instead of to us? How would that change the experience?
I have heard it said in different ways that everything is just the way it needs to be, that everything happens for a reason and that nothing, absolutely nothing happens by mistake. I can say that I have experienced some things that I felt were painful and not fair, and looking back now I can see that I am who I am today and have come to be where I am because of those experiences.
Although some of the experiences have been hard to understand and even embrace as a good thing, I can say today that I am glad the way things turned out because it forced me to choose a path that perhaps without those experiences I would not be living the life I am today.
An experienced I had was ending the marriage to my children’s dad. At the time this took place, my children were eight, seven, and five years old. It was a painful and fearful time for my children and for me. The fear of being a single mother and the impact it would have on my children was huge, yet I knew that there was a reason for this and that somehow everything would turn out all right. Of course this feeling was very faint and deep within me, yet I was able to hear it and trust it even though everything on the outside said otherwise.
Today my children are 22, 20, and 19 years old. I can’t say that it was easy raising my children alone, but I can say that there has been much growth, healing, and evolution for both my children and myself. I have an amazing, loving, and healthy relationship with my husband of five years, my children are amazing beings, and we have healthy and loving relationships.
Today I live a life beyond my wildest dreams. Today when life happens I have the choice of embracing whatever the situation is and knowing that it comes with a gift for me to open. Today life happens for me, not to me.
Beautiful, Maria! Reading this I feel the same lovely compassionate and wise energy that I feel when I’m in a room with you. Thank you.
Thank you for your kind words Elana.
Maria
Maria,
I always love reading your posts because I feel many of the connections you have made on your journey to discovering your most authentic self are also connections I have made in my own journey and I resonate with what your heart speaks. As I read your post today, I got half way through and my heart stopped for a second as I realized I was holding my breath not quite ready to continue reading further. This was not something I had thought about in a long time and it kind of surprised me that that one little sentence would produce such a reaction of sadness in me. The feelings were fleeting and your divorce to dad didn’t have a big effect on my life, as I was 17 at the time, but it made me realize how far the influence of our actions can extend. Being his daughter and their sister, I experienced a different angle of that story and it has most certainly shaped who I am now and how I behave in my own life. I am grateful for the way everything happened between you and dad and me and all of my siblings, as well as me and you, because I have gained a perspective that allows me to feel acceptance, peace, tolerance, and forgiveness in my own recent divorce. Almost immediately after my husband left me, my children’s new step mother was pregnant. All I could think when I first heard was how blessed my children are to have their family expand like I watched mine at their age. There is nothing that could ever break apart the connections I share with all of my siblings no matter who our parents are and I teach my children to remain close to all of their family no matter what happens or how far they go. I too am grateful for that fateful decision you made regarding leaving my father, and leaving with my siblings, although I could not see any good at the time.
Thank you Hannah for your incredible honesty of your experience with my blogs and in particular “For Me Not To Me.”
I appreciate you sharing your heart felt experience.
I am grateful for you in my life.
With Love,
Maria
Maria…as I was reading your post today I realized how much my journey mirrors your journey in life. You’ve come so far and I’m so happy for you. I also believe that everything happens for a reason. I’ve struggled for years, wondering why things happen to me or in my life but sometimes realize much later that it was a blessing in some way. Your story touches my heart and soul…and I’m so grateful for finding your blog and new inspiration!
Thank you for your comment Melissa. It is good to hear people’s stories. As they share their struggles and triumphs, it gives us the hope, strength,and courage to trust the process of our journey; where we’ve been, where we are, and where we want to be. I look forward to hearing more of your story.
With Love,
Maria